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SIGNS YOU’VE HIRED A BAD CATERER: |
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Party punch — subcontracted to a couple of frat guys |
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Vegetable tray — a plate of french fries with their custom “delicious red tomatoey dip” |
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Crock pot of meatballs — instead of toothpicks, bobbing instructions |
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Bunny Hatt
— Trickem, Alabama
"At my last party, the caterer was fine, but the magic act I had booked cancelled at the last minute. I was less than pleased with the substitute act they sent—Wheezy the Amazing Chain Smoker."
Speaking of catering, do the WTO and global trade agreements cater to big corporations at the expense of our environment and the safety of our food?
Serve up the next page
Or go to list of jokes
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“Party Girl” – Elvis Costello, from the album Armed Forces |
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They say you're nothing but a party girl,
Just like a million more all over the world.
I know I shouldn't be raising my hopes so high
But I
Have seen the hungry look in their eyes;
They'd settle for anything in disguise
Of love. Seen the party girls look me over;
Seen 'em leaving when the party's over . . .
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Album Review: Elvis Costello's first two albums were a notable success, spawning hit singles and establishing Costello as one of the top emerging stars in the punk-turned-new-wave world that was blossoming in the late 1970s. As good as those first two albums were, however, the pinnacle was to be the third studio album, Armed Forces (officially from "Elvis Costello and the Attractions"). As Costello's production skills and sense of melody and
timing caught up with his towering talent for crafting tongue-tripping and brain-twisting lyrics, the result was an astonishing array of tight, hip, bouncy pop songs. Armed Forces opens with "Accidents Will Happen," which became a major hit single. For those of you who know this song and like it, the good news is that the rest of the album is just as good, sometimes better. Other melodic monsters on Armed Forces include "Moods for
Moderns," "Big Boys," "Busy Bodies," "Senior Service" and, especially, "Oliver's Army." Things slow down a little for the sardonic "Party Girl" and the almost-delicate "Green Shirt"; and Costello practically smolders on the exquisite "Chemistry Class." The song "Goon Squad" and the live version of "Watching the Detectives" share a wonderfully bold, fat sound that (unfortunately) would go AWOL from Costello's army of sounds on some of his subsequent albums. Lastly, a second major single popped out of
Armed Forces—the world anthem, "(What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love And Understanding?" Armed Forces is widely recognized as Elvis Costello's pop peak, and this excellent Rhino repackaging does it great justice. The double-CD package gives you all the songs from the original vinyl release and adds an out-take from the Armed Forces sessions—the enjoyably quirky "Sunday's Best"—as well as five non-LP B-sides and a
slew of alternate and live versions; all totaling up to 30 tracks. This album is a great example of New Wave in top form. Ten-hut!
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