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Bar Room Joke
A bar room joke with barroom tips for women on an arsonist as a would-be dating partner.
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BAR ROOM TIPS FOR WOMEN — SIGNS THE GUY YOU’RE TALKING TO MAY BE AN ARSONIST: |
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You don't smoke, but he keeps saying, "Here, let me light that for you" |
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Every turn in the conversation seems to lead you back to an analysis of where the bad guy in "Backdraft" screwed up |
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After a few beers, he starts feeling chummy, slaps you on the back and lets you know that if you ever run out of gasoline, he's got plenty in his trunk |
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You ask him back to your place, start fooling around, and then find out all he's got in his wallet are incendiary fuses |
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Flint Striker
— Burning Ridge, South Carolina
"Most disappointing movie ever? 'Quest for Fire.' Needed waaaaay more fire."
After you recover from your bar room romp, you may start wondering whether global warming is going to one day set our world on fire ... and you might decide you're interested in trying a few personal
global warming solutions ...
Or go to list of jokes
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ADVERTISEMENT
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“Ready Or Not” – Jackson Browne, from the album For Everyman |
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I met her in a crowded bar room—
One of those typical Hollywood scenes;
I was doing my very best Bogart,
But I was having trouble getting into her jeans.
I punched an unemployed actor
Defending her dignity;
He stood up and knocked me through that barroom door,
And that girl came home with me . . .
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Album Review: Jackson Browne found his songwriting muscle on his second album, For Everyman. While his first album was a fine collection of nice, if somewhat indistinct, folk-rock songs, there are many songs on Everyman that are notably memorable, many of them featuring lyrics and passages that were destined to become etched in his fans' minds forever. The album opens with a decent ...um... "cover" of "Take It Easy"—a
song that Browne wrote and played before the Eagles found stardom with it. "I Thought I Was A Child," "Our Lady Of The Well," and "For Everyman" all find the right mix of plaintiveness, melody, and commentary. Browne manages to rock out with the catchy "Red Neck Friend," and follows up with a seeming sequel, "Ready Or Not," a clever
number about lurching into parenthood. "Colors Of The Sun" and "These Days" are two of Browne's all-time best songs, with soaring harmonies and striking lyrics. But as with any of Jackson Browne's best albums, the strength of For Everyman lies in its consistency. The standout songs provide nice reference points, but the true pleasure is just putting the disc on and letting it wash over the churning folds of your mind.
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