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FUNNY WEALTH QUOTES

Find in this page the riches of funny quotations about wealth, the wealthy, being rich, millionaires, billionaires.

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Funny Wealth Quotes ...
GENERAL

If all the rich people in the world divided up their money among themselves, there wouldn't be enough to go around.

— Christina Stead

The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.

— Anatole France

The only thing I like about rich people is their money.

— Nancy Astor

This is an impressive crowd: the Have's and Have-more's. Some people call you the elites. I call you my base.

— George W. Bush

If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars.

— Henry George

Rich bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others.

— Oscar Wilde

When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him, 'whose?'

— Don Marquis

The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth that it prevents you from achieving.

— Russell Green

Wealth: Any income that is at least one hundred dollars more a year than the income of one's wife's sister's husband.

— H. L. Mencken

We live by the Golden Rule. Those who have the gold make the rules.

— Buzzie Bavasi

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

— W. C. Fields

Many men of course became extremely rich, but this was perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of because no one was really poor, at least no one worth speaking of.

— Douglas Adams

There's no money in poetry, but then there's no poetry in money, either.

— Robert Graves


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Funny Wealth Quotes ...
FROM MOVIES AND TV

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Bender From Futurama

Bender: "I like it here. I have wealth, fame, and access to the depths of sleaze that those things bring."

From Big Bang Theory

Sheldon: "It doesn't matter if he's showering her with gifts. Because the Koothrappali's are vastly wealthy."

Penny: "What do you mean, 'vastly wealthy'?"

Sheldon: "Well, wealthy means a lot of money, and vastly means even more. I'm not sure what's tripping you up."

From How I Met Your Mother

Marshall Eriksen: "He's rich? Please tell me he wrote you a big, fat check. A check so fat, it doesn't take its shirt off when it goes swimming."

From Saturday Night Live, Deep Thoughts

Jack Handy: "If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like I am now."

From Saturday Night Live, Weekend Update

Seth Myers: "Developers this week introduced the Puma, a new two-wheeled, two-seat electric vehicle that they say is a fast, safe, and clean way to show people that you're a rich weirdo."

Daffy Duck From Looney Toons

Daffy Duck: "Consequences, shmonsequences! So long as I'm rich!"

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Funny Wealth Quotes ...
DREAMS OF WEALTH

Whether you wind up with a nest egg or a goose egg depends on the kind of chick you married.

— Wall Street Journal

Every day, I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work.

— Robert Orben

Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.

— Rita Rudner

They say it is better to be poor and happy than rich and miserable, but how about a compromise, like moderately rich and just moody?

— Princess Diana

There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one.

— Jack Yelton

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

— Frank Hubbard

I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.

— Mark Twain



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Funny Quotes about Being Wealthy and...
BEARING UP UNDER THE STRAIN OF RICHES

"Nothing is more admirable than the fortitude with which millionaires tolerate the disadvantages of their wealth."

Rex Stout

"It is the wretchedness of being rich that you have to live with rich people."

Logan Pearsall Smith

"PHILANTHROPIST, n. A rich (and usually bald) old gentleman who has trained himself to grin while his conscience is picking his pocket."

Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

"[Money] frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy."

Groucho Marx

"My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income."

Errol Flynn



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AUDIO CLIPS
ON PLUTOCRACY & ELITES

CATEGORY:  HISTORY, FINANCIAL — 14.FEB.2015

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good Peak Prosperity

Either We Break the Bankster Alliances or They Will Break Us — Nomi Prins reviews the historical circumstances that led to the formation of the big-bank-controlled Federal Reserve; that is, how the financial foxes were put in charge of the public's hen house. She then explains how many rich US elites in the late 1800s/early 1900s thought that keeping money flowing and not being too draconian helped the masses, which in turn helped the elites maintain the system that provided the wealth. But some bankers were not of a mind to play the game this way, and Louis Brandeis warned: "We must break the Money Trust or the Money Trust will break us." Nomi Prins says we are headed into a new era of high banker mischief, vast income gaps, and reckless behavior among leaders and elites. She says we must take heed of Brandeis' warning and take down the banker-corporate-politician-industrial complex.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   52:45

GP comment:  I have passed on a couple of Prins interviews earlier this year, but here she is starting to step outside the envelope and address the bankster power structure as the criminal enterprise that it truly is.

Original Show Pub Date: 31.Jan.2015

CATEGORY:  MEDIA, EMPIRE — 13.FEB.2015

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good Democracy Now

Endless War, Endless War Spin — As Obama talks about a new major cycle of the war on terror—this time against the Islamic State—Norman Solomon of the Institute for Public Accuracy says Obama talks about not being interested in "endless war" but is doing more than any previous president to engage the US in exactly that. Solomon also says Brain Williams' worst lies about war were not his exaggerations of his personal experiences reporting from danger zones but rather his parroting the war propaganda of both the Bush and Obama administrations and his failure to challenge any aspect of the corrupt endless-war agenda. Of course, all the big names in media did the same. Finally, Solomon talks about the case of CIA whistleblower Jeffrey Sterling, who has been persecuted for exposing a dodgy CIA operation to the Senate Intelligence Committee.
Watch A  |  Watch B  |  Watch C
Download/listen   17:18

GP comment:  Solomon is very good here. The title of his book gives some indication of his tone: War Made Easy: How Presidents and Pundits Keep Spinning Us to Death.

Original Show Pub Date: 12.Feb.2015 ~~ Original story titles ... Endless War? Obama Sends Congress Expansive Anti-ISIS Measure 6 Months After Bombing Began ~~ Brian Williams Suspended for False Iraq Tale, But Media's Real Scandal is the War Lies Spun Daily ~~ Was Jeffrey Sterling Trial a Gov't Effort to Divide Investigative Journalists & Whistleblowers?

CATEGORY:  EMPIRE — 11.FEB.2015

Rating: 5 of 5 - Must-listening! Uprising

Understanding the Roots of Terrorism—Theirs and Ours — Much of President Obama's record-breaking defense budget proposal will fund proxy wars around the globe. The US is training and arming Sunni tribal groups in Iraq to fight ISIS, and it may soon begin supplying weapons to the Ukrainian military against Russia. Drone strikes continue to take their toll in Yemen and elsewhere. Meanwhile, a jingoistic film called ĎAmerican Sniperí glorifies killing and demonizes Muslims with virtually no historical context. Chris Hedges says most Americans accept the myth of American rightness and do-goodism while ignoring the obvious parallels in the terrorism practiced by the US and the terrorism practiced by ISIS and their ilk. He says the empire is not only busy abroad but is also quietly pre-positioning suppressive-force capabilities on the home front, in preparation for the inevitable pushback from the masses as their impoverishment worsens.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   27:32

GP comment:  Many excellent points in this one.

Original Show Pub Date: 09.Feb.2015

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