"When I was a kid, I went to the store and asked the guy, 'Do you have any toy train schedules?' "
"I didn't get a toy train like the other kids. I got a toy subway instead. You couldn't see anything, but every now and then you'd hear this rumbling noise go by."
"The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent."
"I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a note on it saying, 'toys not included.' "
"Apparently the new high-tech Star Wars toys will be in stores any day now. The toys can talk and are interactive, so they can be easily distinguished from Star Wars fans."
"If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?"
"I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio."
"It's amazing how much a few pieces of plastic and paper will sell for if the purchasers are parents or grandparents."