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FUNNY POLLUTION QUOTES

This page of funny pollution quotes positively belches funny air pollution quotes. It dumps funny water pollution quotes all over and buries some funny toxic pollution quotes in your brain.

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Funny Pollution Quotes ...
AIR POLLUTION

"Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees."

David Letterman

"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"

Lee Iacocca, CEO/Chairman, Chrysler Corporation, 1979-1992

"There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all."

Robert Orben

"Remember when atmospheric contaminants were romantically called stardust?"

Lane Olinghouse


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Funny Quotes about
WATER POLLUTION

"Man is a complex being; he makes the deserts bloom and lakes die."

Gil Stern

"Give a man a fish, and he can eat for a day. But teach a man how to fish, and he'll be dead of mercury poisoning inside of three years."

Charles Haas



 

Funny Quotes about
POLLUTION IN GENERAL

"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."

Dan Quayle, former US vice president

"Oh Beautiful for smoggy skies, insecticided grain,
For strip-mined mountain's majesty above the asphalt plain.
America, America, man sheds his waste on thee,
And hides the pines with billboard signs, from sea to oily sea."

George Carlin

"We have met the enemy and he is us."

Walt Kelly (from "Pogo")

"We have found the sources of hazardous waste and they are us."

US EPA, from "Everybody's Problem: Hazardous Waste"

"You go into a community and they will vote 80 percent to 20 percent in favor of a tougher Clean Air Act, but if you ask them to devote 20 minutes a year to having their car emissions inspected, they will vote 80 to 20 against it. We are a long way in this country from taking individual responsibility for the environmental problem."

William D. Ruckelshaus, former EPA administrator

 
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Funny Pollution Quotes ...
FROM MOVIES AND TV

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From Married With Children

Al Bundy: "Ho, ho, ho. What do you want for Christmas little boy?"

Matt: "I don't really want anything. I just want an end to pollution. Let's start here. You're breath stinks!"

From Holly Hobbie and Friends: Christmas Wishes

Gary Hobbie:: "What inspired you to break out the old sleigh?"

Bud Morris: "Well, with so many folks coming to town, I figured we could use a taxi service that didn't use so much gas and pollute our fresh air. All set?"

Robby Hobbie: "Hang on. I just stepped in some horse pollution."

From URBO: The Adventures of Pax Afrika

Maximilian Malice: "Mmmmm, pollution. Smells like profit..."

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THE EVER-POPULAR TORTURED SEGUE

 

Pollution and Health article link; thumb of air pollution IMPURITEASE IN THE AIR AT THE TASSEL CLUB
Pollution is not just something that happens to "the environment." It affects the water we drink, the air we breathe, and the land we grow our food on. So, when it comes to us water-drinking, air-breathing, food-eating humans, what is the relationship between pollution and health?





Funny Pollution Quotes
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If you know of a funny pollution quote that I missed, please email it to me. Provide the text of the quote and who said it (and, if you have it, a web reference where we can verify the text and the spelling of the person's name, etc.). So... email me a quote. Thanks!

 

Feed Your Brain!
AUDIO CLIPS
ON POLLUTION

CATEGORY:  ENVIRONMENT (POLLUTION) — 14.JUN.2014

Rating: 4 of 5 - Very good Quirks and Quarks

Microplastics on Ice — Researchers have discovered that Arctic sea ice is contaminated with tiny fragments of plastic that originated from run-off, dumped garbage, and fishing gear. As multi-year sea-ice disappears, this reservoir of frozen plastic is likely to be released back into the Arctic Ocean. Dr. Rachel Obbard explains why the ice naturally takes up the particles of plastic that enter the Arctic Ocean from the Atlantic and Pacific, and expresses concern that as global warming causes more ice to melt, sea life will be more and more impacted.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   10:24

GP comment:  There aren't many pollution problems worse than plastic.

Original Show Pub Date: 31.May.2014

CATEGORY:  ENVIRONMENT (POLLUTION) — 07.MAY.2014

Rating: 3 of 5 - Good, worth a listen Living on Earth

State of the Air 2014 — This year's State of the Air report from the American Lung Association shows a growing ground-level ozone problem. But the recent Supreme Court decision on interstate air pollution has clean-air advocates smiling. ~~ In a related story, Houston, Texas is home to the largest chemical hub in the Americas and is one of the smoggiest cities in the US. The city is working to clean up its air, but it still has a long way to go.
Go to page A  |  Download/listen A   6:07
Go to page B  |  Download/listen B   5:00

GP comment:  No surprise that the petrochemical industry would be a cause of air pollution in that area.

Original Show Pub Date: 02.May.2014

CATEGORY:  ENVIRONMENT (POLLUTION) — 05.MAY.2014

Rating: 2 of 5 - OK; if you've got the time... NPR

Farmers And Frackers Wrangle For Water In Shadow Of California Drought — California's drought has developed an interesting relationship between farmers and oilers: California oil wells produce more water than oil, and Chevron filters that water and sells it to a local water district. Interest in the technology is growing in the Central Valley, but high costs and uneasy relations between oil and agriculture might get in the way.
Go to page  |  Download/listen   4:58

GP comment:  Yeay! The oil and gas industry saves the day! OK, seriously, it would be good to use "excess water" from petroleum pumping operations IF it's properly cleaned up. But are they willing to spend the bucks needed to properly clean it? Or will they "sort of clean it" and let the subtle contamination just end up part of what grows your food? Always bet on the answer that is the most profitable one.

Original Show Pub Date: 29.Apr.2014

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GP CARTOONS RELATED TO
Pollution

 
Water Cartoon link; thumb of cat burglar IS OUR WATER IS CLEAN ENOUGH?
Water Cartoon
 
save the environment cartoon link; thumb of Red Planet water A FEW DEDICATED PEOPLE'S STRATEGIES FOR HELPING SAVE THE ENVIRONMENT
Save The Environment Cartoon
 
Cartoon/Jokes on Water link; thumb of zombie news man ZOMBIE NEWS CLIPS, VOL. 5 –
WATER ON THE BRAIN

Jokes on Water

VIDEOS RELATED TO
Funny Pollution Quotes

news anchor and Chinese spokesman on screen; click to go to video page at external site; opens in new window

CHINA CELEBRATES ITS STATUS AS WORLD’S NUMBER ONE AIR POLLUTER

Now that the Beijing Olympics are over, China can get back to polluting properly! Enjoy this great dead-pan video satire on the subject, which uses the angle that politicians will try to put a happy face on just about any bad news. Funny stuff from The Onion. Go there

man in suit holding can of 'clean coal' air freshener; click to go to funny video page at external site; opens in new window

“CLEAN COAL” AIR FRESHENER

This short, funny bit of video satire takes on the loosey-goosey term "clean coal," which the coal industry and its political allies love to pretend is "what we're doing with coal today" rather than "a theoretically possible approach to coal that is completely unproven." In fact, not only are there are no "clean coal" plants operating in the US today, there are none even planned. Repeat after me: "There is no such thing as clean coal." From the Coen brothers and the Reality Campaign via YouTube. Go there. Go there

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